virtual reality

[masochistic.enigma]

Virtual Reality

A million faces in the mob
 Each like the other
The clouds of thoughts above their heads almost identical
The opaque faces painted in the color of disavowal
 Each screams uniqueness
 When the uncanny similarity is unconcealable
 Their plain faces saying nothing
 But the storm beneath is unmistakable
Glued to the anachronistic school of thoughts
 They in tend to follow the assiduous revolutionaries
Ironically spending most of their time indulging in languid leisure
When in the end they too will become
An insignificant commoner in the mob
 

[/color]

[cevance]

Something political?

You always seem to create a vivid image in my mind’s eye, which I can’t shake off afterwards. I see people gathered about in protest, shouting, becoming a single unit---single consciousness--- of course though, you might be trying to trick me too… This might be one of those silly love poems that everyone’s so fond of…

I like this piece, although, I really don’t like the word mob in the first line. I think crowd would be a better choice, then that would play into the last line----( the crowd turning into a mob) …Hummmmm!!!!   

And please don’t crucify me---I don’t claim to have any literary skills. I’m only the kitchen help on weekends. 

C.E.Vance

[masochistic.enigma]

u hv no idea hw glad i am to hear from u but i must crucify u fr the delay.

of course the  criticism is welcome. as always.
i think the line in the virtual reality need not be changed cz the idea is not progressive but descriptive. m not making them " become" anything but simply explaining what they r and hv always been despite their incessant pleas as to the contrary. they all... the great thinkers say that they are different but in reality they are a shadow of the past. they think what was practical 50 yrs back still is... they think what has already been thought then how r they different... they are all the same... even if they say otherwise... i hope it makes sense ...

 and as far as banyan tree is concerned u r probably right... i might change it... who knows...

[cevance]

And yes it makes all kinds of sense... It is what it is...Thank you for enlightening me as to why it's written as such. A mob is a mob is a mob...And two is eight.

Anyway---I had some problems here, which is why I disappeared. Please don't crucify me too hard, because it might hurt. lalalalala..

CEV